Lord Mayor in 'Bit of a Fishwife' Horror

At long last there's a sex scandal to write about, I can finally put in my first bid for a lucrative career in tabloid journalism. It's not an opportunity I expect to turn up often.

You've probably seen it already but the 'Post' is reporting that Norman Packer, Lord Mayor Jeannie Packer's husband and 'consort', has allegedly been up to a bit of slap and tickle behind his wife's back with a 38 year old 'lovely' (not bad so far, got an 'allegedly' and a patronising term for a female third party in early on, I can smell that tabloid cash cow already).

Apparently he took the woman off to a hotel Ibis in Chesterfield which shows that he really knows how to show a girl a good time. However, as is usual in these things, the accounts start to differ at this stage.

The woman, according to the Post, has asked not to be named. So you'll have to go and read its national sister title the Daily Mail to find out that she's called Karen Trevis, a fellow Labour Party member. She claims that they did the beast with two backs thang, saying she didn't want to but decided to lie back and think of The Party.

"It lasted a couple of hours" she said.

Now to be honest, I'd want that detail left in but Mr Packer says it's all 'codswallop'. He says that he had a guilt trip and couldn't go through with the evil deed. I suppose we'll never know the real truth, not unless there's some Clinton stylee 'DNA' on a dress somewhere anyway.

And to be honest, if it had ended there, neither would I really care beyond a bit of pointing and staring. But it's claimed that Packer later proposed a vote to have Ms Trevis removed from her (unspecified) party position. The vote went against her but the decision was later overturned. Sounds somewhat less than gentlemanly you might say and I, for one, might well agree with you.

Somewhat more amusingly (and the reason for this piece's title) Mrs Packer apparently went round to Ms Trevis' house to 'berate' her over the matter, to the extent that the police were called. That's something you'd want to see isn't it, the Lord Mayor banging on the door screaming blue murder at the scarlet woman? Good to see that the dignity of this ancient office is being preserved.

In time, a complaint against Mr P was made to party bigwigs who launched an investigation. Packer has since resigned from the party for unconnected reasons, he says. The Packers are currently on their hols 'out of the County' (presumably not wanting to waste that 2 for 1 offer with Ibis) and aren't contactable.

I wonder if that will be the end of the story? There are hints that the whole matter came about due to jealousy and infighting in the local Labour party which I'd like to hear more about. I suppose I could ask Mr Packer, it seems he's planning on continuing with his role leading tours of the Council House so he's easy to reach. For any ladies thinking of going on one of these tours, can I suggest that you go in twos?

Update - More on this from the 'Post' at 6.50pm. Looks like they've now been given clearance by head office to name Ms Trevis. And they're allowing comments on this one now, let loose the dogs of crass war...

Updateagain - They've changed it now, comments no longer allowed. I love the 'Post's' comments policy, race hate is fine but upset the Lord Mayor? Oh no...

Update 26 August - He's gone.